lennonlively:

i told this girl she smelled nice today and she’s like

“sorry i’m not gay”

bitch i said you smelled nice not i want to lick your pussy

LOLOLOL

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leassvengers:

so I bought my mom this cup with a hot dude having coffee because my mom is fun and i thought this might like her.

image

BUT THEN I SERVE MYSELF COFFEE IN IT AND TURNS OUT THAT WHEN THE CUP GETS HOT

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THE DUDE LOSES HIS PANTS AND THAT’S COFFEE AND PORN AND I DONT KNOW WHAT KIND OF SORCERY THIS IS!

(Source: sassyrocket)

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